CORNY
And now,
broadcast live infront of a live studio audience, for the first time from the certified,
up-to code WYDT studio,
it's the Corny Collins Hairspray Spectacular...
COUNCIL GIRLS
He's Corny!!
CORNY
...brought to you by Ultra Clutch Hairspray!
CORNY (& ENSEMBLE)
What gives a girl
Power and punch?
Is it charm, is it poise?
No, it's hairspray!
What gets a gal
Asked out to lunch
Is it brains, is it dough?
No, it's hairspray!
If you take a ride
With no can at your side
Then your flip will be gone
With the wind
But if you spray it and lock it,
You can take off in a rocket
And in outer space
Each hair will be in place
Why take a chance
When you get up and dance
If you twist, i insist
You use hairspray
And tell your mother
Her head she should smother
With "ultra-clutch" faithfully
So if you're a redhead,
A blonde or brunette
Just take my advice
And you might just get
The only thing better than hairspray
CORNY
That's me!
ENSEMBLE
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya
Doo-dle-e-ya do wah
CORNY
Forget the milkman
The only thing better than hairspray
ENSEMBLE
Hairspray! Wow!
CORNY
That's me!
CORNY & ENSEMBLE
What makes a man
Reach out and touch?
Ultra clutch!
CORNY & ENSEMBLE
So if you're a redhead,
A blonde or brunette
Just take my advice
And you might just get
CORNY
The only thing better than hairspray
That's me!
ENSEMBLE
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya
Doo-dle-e-ya do wah
COUNCIL GIRLS
He's Corny Collins!
CORNY
The only thing better than hairspray
ENSEMBLE
Hairspray! Wow!
CORNY
That's me!
ENSEMBLE
He's Corny Collins
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah!
Do wow!
CORNY
"Hey, baby, you look like you could use a stiff one!"
NOREEN
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya-do do wah!!!!